News to Amuse

Baby Tossing Ritual in Solapur, India: Local officials in Solapur, India, have released footage of an ancient ritual known to much of the world as “Crazy MotherF*ckers Tossing Babies.” For over 500 years, villagers have gathered in western India for this festive event, in which newborn babies are tossed from the roof of a shrine, 50 feet above ground. The airborne babies flutter naked through the air, landing with a bounce on a stretched sheet held somewhat taut by local participants. The villagers believe that the ritual brings the babies luck and good health. They also proudly proclaim that no accidents have ever happened in the 5+ century practice. A study by the Journal of Random Shit has revealed that adults who were themselves “tossed” as children are “normal.” The study reveals, however, that nearly 50% of all adults who were once “tossed” have crapped in their pants in the town Ferris Wheel and that nearly 40% of these individuals have crapped in their pants when dreaming about crapping in their pants.

With viewership taking a nosedive, Price is Right host Drew Carey has proposed a new game on the popular game show: Baby Plinko.  Also inspired by this story, Michael Jackson has begun packing for his move to Solapur.

*Click on the link for the real story!

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