I just wasted an hour of my life attempting to find a doctor. It is May 20. I was told, on multiple occasions, that a particular doctor’s first available appointment would be in September.
First available? In September? Are you kidding me? The DC area is flooded with doctors and lawyers, and your first available is in September? Is it that there are proportionally too many lawyers, and lawyers take too much time in your office? I’d like to tell one of my clients that my first available appointment to talk is in September.
In no other profession can someone legitimately say that their first available is 4 months away. Imagine you called Gold’s for a personal trainer and was told that the first available would be in September. Or if you tried to book a flight and the airlines told you the first available would be 3 months after your friend’s wedding in Hawaii. Or if you needed maid service, and Molly Maids said the dirt can wait until the fall. And these examples don’t involve your health (ok, maybe dirt and personal trainer do, but whatever). So doctors, I boycott you.
Damn it. I can’t. I need them. Argh!!!! I will remain in silent protest then. When you tell me to open wide and say “Ahhh,” I will do so with the intention of sticking my tongue out at you. When you ask me take deep breaths as you listen to my heart, my middle finger will figuratively be pointing at you. And if you need an attorney, my first available is in September, biatch.