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Song of the Week — California Love

In honor of the great day that lies before me tomorrow (and the concurrent cessation of postings until next week), I present to you one of the greatest songs of all time:  California Love.  Throw yo hands up, yo.  Tomorrow, pink will be the new black, and 50 degrees will be the new 20 degrees.  I said Brrr, it’s cold in here.  Gimme some Cali love.

California love!

California…knows how to party
California…knows how to party
In the citaaay of L.A.
In the citaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaay, the city of Compton
We keep it rockin! We keep it rockin!

Verse One: Dr. Dre

Now let me welcome everybody to the wild, wild west
A state that’s untouchable like Elliot Ness
The track hits ya eardrum like a slug to ya chest
Pack a vest for your Jimmy in the city of sex
We in that sunshine state with a bomb ass hemp beat
The state where ya never find a dance floor empty
And pimps be on a mission for them greens
Lean mean money-makin-machines servin fiends
I been in the game for ten years makin rap tunes
Ever since honeys was wearin sassoon
Now it’s ’95 and they clock me and watch me
Diamonds shinin lookin like I robbed Liberace
It’s all good, from Diego to tha Bay
Your city is tha bomb if your city makin pay
Throw up a finger if ya feel the same way
Dre puttin it down for Californ-i-a

California…knows how to party
California…knows how to party
In the citaaay of L.A.
In the citaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaay, the city of Compton
We keep it rockin! We keep it rockin!

Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it mama
Shake it Cali
Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it shake it shake it…

Verse Two: 2Pac

Out on bail fresh outta jail, California dreamin
Soon as I stepped on the scene, I’m hearin hoochies screamin
Fiendin for money and alcohol the life of a west side playa
where cowards die and it’s all raw
Only in Cali where we riot not rally to live and die
In L.A. we wearin Chucks not Ballies (yeah, that’s right)
Dressed in Locs and khaki suits and ride is what we do
Flossin but have caution we collide with other crews
Famous because we programs
Worldwide let’em recognize from Long Beach to Rosecrans
Bumpin and grindin like a slow jam,
It’s west side so you know the row won’t bow down to no man
Say what you say, but give me that bomb beat from Dre
Let me serenade the streets of L.A.
From Oakland to Sacktown the Bay Area and back down
Cali is where they put they mack down – Give me love!

California…knows how to party
California…knows how to party
In the citaaay of L.A.
In the citaaay of good ol’ Watts
In the citaaay, the city of Compton
We keep it rockin! We keep it rockin!

Dr. Dre: now make it shake…

Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it mama
Shake it Cali
Shake it shake it baby
Shake it shake it shake it shake it…

Outro: Dre, 2Pac

(Dre)uh, yeah, uh, longbeach in tha house, uh yeah
Oaktown, Oakland definately in tha house hahaha
Frisco, Frisco
(Tupac) hey, you know LA is up in this
(Dre) Pasadina, where you at
yeah, Ingelwood, Ingelwood always up to no good
(Tupac) even Hollywood tryin to get a piece baby
(Dre) Sacramento, sacramento where ya at? yeah

(Tupac) Throw it up y’all, throw it up, Throw it up, I can’t see ya
Let’s show these fools how we do it on this west side
Cause you and I know it’s tha best side

(Dre)yeah, That’s right
west coast, west coast
uh, California Love
California Love

Did I mention that I know Dr. Dre?  Yeah, we met last year when I was getting my bum knee scoped for the third time.    Dre and I go way back.  Maybe, when I’m in town, I’ll hit up Dre to hook me up with some bomb ass hemp beat.

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Filed under Musical Obsessions, Song of the Week, Travel

What’s the worst thing you can say to someone who just bit it?

So on Monday, I was walking to the Metro (boy, do I have a lot to say about the Metro) and it was raining. Picture this. It’s Monday and I’m off to another day of work. I head off toward the dreaded Metro. I’m wearing my messenger bag. I’m carrying some papers in my left arm. I’m carrying my cane/umbrella in my right hand. I take one step and . . . my right foot sweeps into the air; my face contorts with the pain of someone who is trying to regain her balance but realizes that it just ain’t happening; I reach my left foot out, hoping to regain a balance that has already been hopelessly lost; in an effort to regain balance, I am now parallel to the ground; umbrella flies in the air; I land with a thud on the cold, wet concrete. My body contorts, as my ass thankfully lands on my messenger bag, saving me the humiliation of walking to work with a dirty ass. Although I feel immense pain, I immediately jolt up, hoping, praying in fact, that no one saw this ultimate display of all things not graceful.

Someone behind me says those words you never want to hear . . . “Oh my god. Are you okay?”

Note to self. Next time I see someone fall, just ignore him/her. Unless the fallee (I’m a lawyer and it’s my job to make up words) is (a) screaming Bloody Mary; (b) bleeding profusely; (c) passed out; or (d) there is an audible crack — just move on. The humiliation is too much to bear. Even if you have to physically step over the fallee, do NOT say, “Are you okay?” S/he is okay. Until you say that. So shut the hell up and move on.

Oh, and for all you lawyers out there. My file of papers was safe. Thank god. They were originals. Note to self. Don’t take home originals, you fucking moron.

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Filed under Personal Pontification, WMATA - Metro